Aries: Lots of hugs. They will often challenge you, whether this is challenging your beliefs or trying to prove their worth by winning a game. They get jealous easily and may come off as harsh when they see you flirting with or giving attention to someone else. They will think about you more than they like to admit. They will want to be updated with what’s going on in your life, and will actually show interest in your routines/interactions with others. There is a good chance these guys will just tell you how they feel.
Taurus: They’ll ask for your opinions on things and will try to hold stimulating conversations with you. All of your quirks and bad habits will become cute to them. They will look at you like you are this special human being who must be protected at all costs. Sometimes they’ll make fun of you, but all good natured. You will consume their thoughts.
Your phone suddenly receives an emergency alert that tells you to seek shelter immediately. Your pet slowly walks up to you, looks you dead in the eye, and says: “The time has come. Follow me.”
I have fish where the fuck you gonna take me, the back corner of your tank?
yesterday my first table at work was 4 complete shitholes who yelled at me twice before i even took their food order and almost made me cry. before they ate, they all bowed their heads to pray.
so on the top of their receipt i wrote “hebrews 13:2″ and they went WILD. they LOVED IT. they tipped me over 20% for my “education fund”.
hebrews 13:2 is “do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it”, and i really hope they got home and looked it up and realized that i am, in fact, a petty fucking bitch
Why do Americans put the month first. It just makes no sense.
We put the month first because in conversation we say, “July 1st, 2015.” Because it’s quicker than “The first of July, 2015.”
“Tomorrow is May 29th” not “Tomorrow is the 29th of May.” That is why we write it 5/29/15 and not 29/5/15. Because we go by how we phrase it in conversation rather than in sequence because it converts better between numbers and language when written in the former.
We also use the month first because that’s how calendars are organized. You have one year and one calendar so the year is a constant and can go in the back. However, calendars aren’t organized my days, but rather by months. You flip to the months first and then find the day. So….
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While on this topic, we also use Fahrenheit and not Celsius because a 0-100 scale of measuring temperature makes a lot more sense to a human. We know that 0 is really fucking cold and 100 is really fucking hot, which makes sense. Celsius, however, is just about how water responds to temperature, and makes no sense when applied to humans. Fahrenheit is for people, Celsius is for water. And I am a people not a water.
oh
I find this very funny cause you say that but your independence day is not called July 4th, its called the 4th of July.
What I find funny is that our armies were about half the size of the British army and yet we were still able to crush your crumby asses, declare independence and pour your tea in the ocean.
